Your butt looks like two squirrels wrestling in a pillowcase

One of the best things about approaching 40 is that I'm no longer under pressure to have a nice ass. As long as I  stay in a reasonable weight range and don't grow those side fat pockets my ranch-raised mom calls "saddlebags," then I can be relatively hot. Relatively. Also as I age I have ever-dwindling opportunities to go streaking, so it matters less if I look good naked.  The point is that I spent most of my twenties and thirties eating raw food and obsessing over triathlons and mountain biking and surfing and thinking always I needed to look better; but now I've had three kids in four years, my stomach looks a little like a ball sack when I bend over, and I worked out Tuesday but haven't had time since, yet I don't worry about my ass at all. It's awesome to be free.